The Babysitter’s Coven

This might be the first in a a series, but it’ll be the last one I read. I picked it up because I was on a witch kick and because it had a pretty cover.

”Adventures in Babysitting meets Buffy the Vampire Slayer in this funny, action-packed novel about a coven of witchy babysitters who realize their calling to protect the innocent and save the world from an onslaught of evil.” What a joke. Esme is 17, and apparently still talks in text-speech, because that’s what all high schoolers do, right? She babysits, which is super lame and not at all what any of my friends did in high school to earn money, no way. Enter Cassandra, who is just as bland as Esme and whose mom left her a super vague note about babysitters. There‘s kind of some magic and kind of some adventure, but overall it’s just some YA novel.

While the book may be about high schoolers, it reads more like they’re middle schoolers. They talk in text to speech, which was my first red flag. There were roughly 30 different LOL, IDK, AF, GTFO, IRL, NBD, FYI, etc, which doesn’t seem like a lot, but once you start noticing them they really take you out of it. There was also an “Oh God!” on almost every page, and for high schoolers they have pretty PG language. By the time I was in high schooler, I was swearing like a sailor. I know it’s not the same for everyone, but come on. “Crap”???

This seems like something my private christian schooled 12 year old sister would read for YA, but she wouldn’t understand the references (some of which even I didn’t get), so who exactly was this book written for? This book is a hot mess. The characters specifically don’t swear, but then sometimes do? They get themselves into precarious situations that any 17yo would know not to let happen (i.e. getting kidnapped by a teacher and forced into his house). The magic rules the book sets up for itself are flimsy at best, and almost immediately ignored or the main characters are exempt. It’s just not a good book.

Trigger warnings: bullying, mental illness, forced institutionalization, child abuse, and death

⛈☁️☁️☁️☁️